Sunday, February 26, 2012

Interval

I am learning about my energy levels and being more compassionate about the low times. I have had some fantastic experiences recently with writing workshops and creative sessions. I have led new experiences for practitioners and have also learnt more about myself and from that I have grown but I have also used up a lot of my energy. I need to be more understanding of the down times and the times when maybe I should be just reading and listening instead of insisting that I create and generate new things. I have had difficult times and difficult interactions with people and from that I have learnt that it is not always about me and that it can be about other people’s needs.

I am tired of being over sensitive and thinking that people don't like me, that I am too much and that I am being nosey or over interfering. My previous experiences have made me very sensitive to these things and I still have bad experiences at the back of my mind.

The coaching course is teaching me to really listen to people and to not leap in and tell people what to do for themselves. In the last week I have learnt that if I really listen and pay attention to what people are saying to me, reflect back to them what they are saying then they come up with solutions and ways forward for themselves. It has been quite a revelation but the trick is to really, really listen. I have to be really disciplined and not add my two opinion or "similar" experience and I have found this hard work but also, strangely, incredibly powerful. Not revealing too much about me has resulted in the people I am coaching revealing more of them to me. I am honoured by this but I also carry a responsibility. However the beauty of coaching is that the contract is about resilience and capacity to cope and that it does not feel as problematic as counselling. People who come for coaching are not as vulnerable, they may have vulnerabilities, don’t' we all, BUT it is not the same as someone who may have undiscovered psychological frailties or mental health issues for which they require support and guidance.

Arts based approaches to coaching are new and I am new to coaching but I can see parallels between the development work I do with the arts (poetry and collage) and the work I am doing when coaching folk. I am beginning to see a glimmer of an answer as to the way forward for me BUT it is still a bit feint.

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